“What else am I going to do, stay here and learn? Road trip!”

Justin’s rating: 1.9 GPA

Justin’s review: Road Trip is little more than a thinly-veiled attempt at college bros trying to hold on to their immature childhood and refusing to accept the responsibility of growing up to father children, invest in mutual funds, and go golfing. I heartily refuse to endorse this film, because of its overt boneheaded themes and allergy to wearing clothes. Go rent a classic that will enlarge your perspective and spur philosophical debates, such as Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.

OK, maybe Road Trip wasn’t quite that bad, but it still carries with it the immature odor of the early 2000s sex-and-barf comedies. It was a phase that we, as cinema attendees, were going through at the time and are now a little embarrassed ever have laughed at these.

We should have known better when this movie begins with Tom Green giving a college tour. Again, this was prior to all of the indictments, controversies, worldwide bans, and ejection of Mr. Green into the corona of the sun. Nobody could have predicted how bad he’d get.

Anyway, Barry (Green) bombs with his tour group, so he instead relays an inspirational tale of his friends and a legendary road trip they once made. It seems that dedicated boyfriend Josh (Breckin Meyer) cheated on his long-distance girlfriend. Not only does he cheat, but he accidentally sends her the video tape with his amorous affair on it. That’s an epic way to break up, I suppose, but not to maintain one’s status as “in a serious relationship.”

Thus the mission: grab three good friends, stuff them into a Ford Taurus, and travel 1800 miles to intercept the tape before it gets to his girlfriend the next Monday. Joining him are crass E.L. (Seann William Scott), stoned Rubin (Paulo Costanzo), and ultra-geek Kyle (DJ Quails). Naturally, they get into a lot of adventures on the road (which, for a road trip movie, seems to spend very little time actually driving) which include a party with an all-black fraternity, a trip to the sperm bank, and swiping a bus from the school for the blind. Wholesome, yes?

Meanwhile, Barry stays behind and tries to feed a mouse to Rubin’s snake.

I will not deny that Road Trip is outrageous and tasteless, but it’s also loaded with genuinely funny moments and quotes. It’s still hard to recommend, though, because it really leaned hard into the nudity and gross bits far more than was necessary for laughs. Lump it in with that era of American Pie, Eurotrip, and Dude, Where’s My Car as an exhibit of Hollywood’s awkward puberty phase.