“I risked my life, and you give me light beer?”

Justin’s rating: All the cast and crew must’ve smelled swampy for a couple weeks after filming

Justin’s review: I’m sure the legion of Animal House fans out there deeply wished that the esteemed National Lampoon organization bothered to construct a proper sequel to that prestigious piece of cinema. But the consolation prize of dozens of copycats over the decades after was tribute enough — including one 1984 screwball college comedy that just so happened to star two of Animal House’s most famous figures.

Up the Creek is Animal House 2 in all but name, and it’s actually more enjoyable, in my opinion. Stephen Furst and Tim Matheson pushed their age envelopes to be college kids again (albeit ones in their 12th year) and bring a zany anarchy to every project they undertake.

However, instead of staying on campus, this movie heads into the wild awfully quick. McGraw (Matheson), Gonzer (Furst), Max (Don Monahan, Porky’s), and Irwin (Sandy Helberg, Spaceballs) are four of the biggest slackers at their pathetic school. Their  dean offers them a deal: Win a prestigious rafting race for the university, and they can all graduate with any degree they want.

N0, it’s absolutely nothing you haven’t seen in many other ’80s flicks, including snooty preppies, women of loose morals, and some weird, out-of-nowhere sports competition that shouldn’t be a thing but is for this movie only. A college rafting competition? Who would even care about this, never mind award trophies for it?

But hey, it’s an excuse for a goofs vs. nature adventure with that freewheeling ’80s vibe, and I’m down for it.

It’s hard not to look at Tim Matheson and see a guy who’s trying so hard to reprise a role that he’s outgrown. But he’s having fun, what with his character womanizing and vocally narrating his own life, and I don’t blame him for taking the opportunity for one last fling.

Our heroic goons have to contend with the “Ivys” cheating their way to the finish line, an insane cadre of military students, a couple possible romances (Jennifer Runyon from Ghostbusters plays a feathery haired hothead who falls in love with McGraw), and the odd adventures of their super-intelligent dog Chuck.

Up the Creek is, to no surprise, somewhat lowbrow — the quips and skin are there to make a neanderthal grunt in approval — but it’s hard not to appreciate the chaotic energy at play in a lot of these scenes. This film had way more explosions and weird spy gadgets than I was expecting. Not a complaint.

While low on the laugh-out-loud quotient and any original concepts, Up the Creek delivers a reliably enjoyable time even so. It’s basic (the editing can’t seem to handle a comedy well) and cheesy and incredibly ’80s, yet the goofs and outdoor locales do a lot to lift the spirits of the viewer, not to mention a very lively soundtrack. I watched this while on vacation in the wild of Tennessee and found that it was a great companion piece to a week in nature.

Intermission!

• These might be the most boring opening credits to any ’80s screwball comedy… couldn’t spring for actual visuals?
• Great way to arrest the audience’s attention by focusing on a pair invading figures from the waist down
• Shooting a guy in the butt with an arrow seems like it would have consequences
• This campus has a lot of firepower
• “Jose has no green card. Donde esta la Jose?”
• He was expelled from 16 colleges? He changed his major 23 times? And nobody bothered to vet him?
• The fat guy should be eating a huge banana split sundae in the car
• “Your temple is starting to resemble the astrodome!”
• A switchblade paddle
• Punching out your ex-girlfriend is not a good move
• Smoking a big cigar doesn’t help you look like a college student… or someone under 50
• “Will you look at all that beefcake?”
• What first aid technique does wrapping a tablecloth around someone’s midsection actually do?
• Spilling popcorn on a girl is not a good pickup line?
• McGraw likes to narrate his life
• Where did Heather get so many candles in a hotel? Is there a rental service?
• Diving out a plate glass window and then into a dumpster doesn’t seem like a great idea
• What guys share the same cologne? I mean, other than these guys.
• Don’t aim the starting pistol at actual people
• Slingshotting a guy seems pretty fun… as long as it’s not me
• We had drones in 1984… sort of
• What college kids drink champagne?
• I want to know how the Ivys dragged a fully functional hot tub into the woods
• Not a lot of movies do we see an exploding hot tub-slash-fireworks show
• Chuck the dog is great at charades
• Torpedoes ahoy!
• “Oh my God, they cut him into steaks!”
• So. Many. Explosions.