“You’re killin’ me, Smalls!”

Justin’s rating: Guys, I don’t think that’s a real dog. I suspect it’s a prop.

Justin’s review: You know what’s always a Fun Time? Whenever you blurt out in mixed company that you’ve never seen a beloved popular movie that “everyone” has seen. People gawp at you and exclaim how utterly stupid you’ve been neglecting this one experience. I mean, everyone’s seen it! Everyone quotes it! You dunderhead!

OK, well, I grew up in the ’90s, I’m a fairly prolific movie reviewer, yet I’ve never seen The Sandlot before today. No great reason for it, I just didn’t. So go ahead and gawp away, look at the freak, but know that if I probed enough, I could find a similar example in your life. Don’t be a hypocrite, is what I’m saying.

Set in 1962, The Sandlot centers around Scotty Smalls (Tom Guiry), a fifth grade transplant who finds himself in a strange town without any friends. That is, until he meanders over to play baseball at the local sandlot with a group of oddball kids who would keep going even though nobody was keeping score or making teams.

Over the course of the summer, Smalls learns how to play proper baseball and goes on a series of adventures with his new pals. This includes an entanglement with the local guard dog, a memorable “kiss” with a certain lifeguard, camping out, trying out chewing tobacco, a game against the richies, and a missing Babe Ruth ball.

But mostly it’s about kids playing baseball. A lot of baseball.

The Sandlot is definitely mid-90s Disney — very kid-centric, generally wholesome, and not edgy or subversive in the least. I can see this being a foundational film for younger viewers in 1993, but I can also say that as a 17-year-old at the time, this wouldn’t have impressed me. Even now, it’s hard to age my imagination down to click with this. It’s a little too basic and not that funny to anyone over a certain age.

It doesn’t mean it’s a bad movie, though. The Sandlot is sweet as it strives to show us the world of summer through kids’ eyes, and the occasional narration helps to make the meandering story go down smooth.

There’s a term, I think, for being nostalgic for a childhood that you never had. And when you watch movies like The Sandlot, A Christmas Story, and Stand By Me, it’s not hard to catch that feeling. The extra veneer of the stylized ’60s adds to the visual zest. And sure, maybe that’s not your history, but there’s nothing stopping you from living vicariously through a bunch of best friends by watching this.

Intermission!

• The director said that the kid actors had an absolute blast filming this over the course of the summer, with many of them becoming real-life friends
• There were two sequels: The Sandlot 2 (2005) and The Sandlot: Heading Home (2007). The last one involved time travel, believe it or not.
• The smack of the ball into the eye, everyone could see that coming
• Everyone introduces themselves by spitting
• “The kid is an L-7 weenie!”
• This movie made me want s’mores pretty bad
• I love the old timey robbers outfits
• I do not feel comfortable with how much this movie fetishizes Wendy
• Ham flexing and then doing a cannonball
• “She knows exactly what she’s doing.”
• How many kids tried chewing tobacco because of this film?
• Every kids movie in the ’90s had to have a puking scene, right?
• The decoy ball is so transparently fake
• They just ruined a lot of expensive vacuum cleaners
• Do you remember Erector sets? This movie does!
• That cake was destined to bite the dust