“Popeyes chicken is the shiznit!”

Justin’s rating: I always remember this as the “Hitler-pineapple movie”

Justin’s review: I think everyone has an Adam Sandler movie that they first hated — and I include Adam Sandler fans in that statement. And while his collection of ’90s comedies brought out some critics, it was his first film in the new millennium that caught an absolute tidal wave of flak. People loved to rag on Little Nicky as an unlikable stinker. They still do, even decades after when Sandler stopped trying and dipped into some truly atrocious roles.

But is Little Nicky as awful and irredeemable as remembered? Does it deserve another look, a re-evaluation? That’s what’s at stake in this review.*

What I respect is that, no matter the end product, Sandler and company were swinging big with this movie. This is easily the most outlandish of his films to date. Prior to Little Nicky, he was goofy lawyer guy, sports guy, another sports guy, wedding singer, and mentally challenged man-child. Then his creative team is like, “Why not play the literal SON OF SATAN but he’s good somehow?” and Sandler was cool with it.

I cannot overstate how much of a departure this was from Sandler’s previous filmography. It’s a stupid comedy, yes, but it’s also saturated in supernatural fantasy and loaded with special effects. The budget was triple — and that’s no exaggeration — than what was normally spent on one of his films. And then in the face of that, they decided to give Adam Sandler a horrible hairstyle and a really weird wheezy talking style to make him sound like a demented creep for the entire tale.

Seriously, what did they think would happen?

Speaking of the story, Satan (Harvey Keitel, good choice) is retiring for 10,000 years (guh?) and picking one of his three sons to rule hell during that stretch. But when he can’t bring himself to hand over the keys to any of them, two of the brothers escape to earth, freeze hell’s entrance, and try to create their own kingdom in our world. So it becomes up to third brother Nicky (Sandler) to venture above and stop his wayward siblings.

Nicky’s a pretty nice if slightly dense kid, which is a little strange, all things considered. He gets killed a lot while trying to figure things out on earth, but he makes some headway thanks to a talking bulldog who guides him, a couple of heavy metal acolytes, and a love interest from the Arquette clan.

It’s here that we must also acknowledge that about 12% of this film — again, no exaggeration — serves as product placement for Popeyes Chicken. Then there’s the usual parade of Sandler’s cronies along with a bunch of high-profile celebrities who probably regretted this afterward. Hi Quentin Tarantino for some reason!

The fantasy sets and effects are fine, imaginative even, but it’s way too much of an ask us to accept Nicky as a likable Sandler character that we want to see succeed. He’s off-putting and nothing like any of his other roles.

And the worst sin of them all is that our main character and pretty much everyone else in Little Nicky aren’t funny at all. I remember not laughing once the first time I watched this, and that didn’t change for this second viewing. It certainly doesn’t help that the style of (attempted) humor is far more puerile than normal for one of his movies. Again, that’s saying something.

When you show up to a comedy that isn’t funny but is off-putting, there simply isn’t anything that can save the experience. Not a demon with breasts on his head, not Rodney Dangerfield, and not all of the late-90s CGI in the world. Unfunny comedies are tedious slogs. And despite some imagination here, a tedious slog this is.

So yes, Little Nicky was a big swing, but it was a much bigger miss, and no amount of time, Adam Sandler worship, and invested delusion can change that.

*Them’s very low stakes.

Intermission!

• Ha, the backwards music for the New Line Cinema logo
• Jon Lovitz having a picnic while peeping tom
• Hell probably has a good heavy metal music section
• You don’t want to be the face in the middle of a dart board
• “I deserve this!”
• Hitler deserves all the pineapples
• Dan Marino is too nice of a guy
• “Are there boobs on my head?”
• Rodney Dangerfield as Lucifer
• Quentin Tarantino as the crazy blind preacher
• Well that’s some CGI dog pee
• Polar bear death
• “I will eat your heart!”
• The Harlem Globetrotters actually lose
• “Did you just talk?” “No.”
• Instant afro
• “Release the evil!”
• Sandler-Spiders
• “I’ve always wanted to kill someone. Can I give it a try?”
• This soundtrack is SO early 2000s, and not necessarily in a good way
• Did that dog just shoot an arrow out of its butt?
• Heaven does not have a modest dress code
• Chubbs from Happy Gilmore is the one cameo I like
• Nothing says “the year 2000” like angels watching Felicity
• And now he’s got Care Bear rainbow powers
• Are we really doing a pillow fight?
• Ozzy vs. bat