“Have you noticed how many crimes there are committed against women these days? It’s like we’re trying to do more for ourselves and there are just some men who are determined to punish us for it.”

Drake’s rating: Vantastic

Drake’s review: Once again I delve into that subgenre of ‘70s cult movies known as vansploitation. This time around, however, the van is not a valued prize yearned for by a teen-ager with self-control issues. Instead, it’s an instrument of terror along the freeways of Los Angeles, driven by a misogynistic psychopath intent on naught but destruction.

Hmm. In hindsight the bad guy might actually be Bobby from The Van after all…

So Hal Needham is something of a Hollywood legend. He was a top stuntman on television and in film, working regularly in Westerns and as Burt Reynolds’ stunt double, and introduced the air bag into stunt work after seeing it in use during a pole vaulting competition. He later moved his way into stunt coordination and second unit directing, and before long was in the director’s chair himself. And it was in that chair that he directed such stunt-driven classics as Smokey and the Bandit, Hooper, and Justin’s favorite film*, Megaforce.

He also made Stroker Ace, but nobody’s perfect.

Along the way Needham was also lured in by CBS to make a TV movie. Not content to churn out a soapy ‘70s melodrama, Needham, along with prolific television writer William Wood, crafted a stunt-driven thriller meant to keep the audience at the edge of their seats. And I have to say, they pretty much succeeded.

Jan Claussen (Shelly Hack, Troll) is a TV reporter on the trail of the driver of a van that’s been targeting women driving alone in Los Angeles. Going into a vehicular rage at the slightest provocation, the driver dons a pair of black gloves, puts in his 8-track tape of weird fiddle music, and then proceeds to chase the women, ram them, and make them crash.

Some of the wrecks have been fatal, but no one seems to be taking these assaults seriously. Lieutenant Haller (Peter Graves, It Conquered the World), the cop on the case, rebuffs Claussen’s concerns and even posits the ludicrous idea that the women were driving like they were asking for it. Because, in all honesty, most of the men in this movie SUCK. And that suckage also includes Claussen’s ex-husband Ray (George Hamilton, Love at First Bite), who’s convinced that his ex-wife still can’t make it in the big, bad world without him. She should’ve smacked the tan right off of him.

You know who doesn’t suck, though? Blanchard (played by Needham himself), who runs a driving school. He contacts Claussen and offers to teach her some useful defensive driving techniques, which is probably going to be a major plot point of this movie. And then there’s the gearhead who’s tired of the van driver giving car enthusiasts a bad name, and who is also friends with a guy who just might know who the Freeway Fiddler, as he’s been dubbed by the press, really is. He and his crew are a rough lot, but they’re also ready & willing to help Claussen get the Fiddler off the road.

Needham loved his misfits, outcasts, and rebels, and that’s as apparent in Death Car on the Freeway as it is in any of his Burt Reynolds films. There’s a significant distrust of suits, straights and The Man. Because Claussen is outside of the norm, what with her wanting to be an intrepid reporter despite having lady parts, she’s the perfect fit for a Needham character. This is an early role for Hack, but she plays Claussen as both young enough to take the occasional foolish risk, and also determined to follow her story no matter the consequences. She’s good in the role, but definitely seems more comfortable acting as an inquisitive reporter than in fending off her ex-husband’s advances. None of the actors have especially meaty roles, as Needham’s focus is unquestionably on the action here.

That’s especially obvious considering the all-star stunt players involved. The stunt crew is loaded up with a ridiculous amount of talent, including future Stone Cold director Craig Baxley and his cousin Gary, Tommy Huff, Janet Brady (who had doubled for Sally Fields in Smokey and the Bandit and whose career reads like an encyclopedia of action movies), Gary Epper, and the seemingly immortal Buddy Joe Hooker. The names may not all be familiar but trust me, if you’ve seen an action movie, you know their work. And in Death Car on the Freeway Needham lets them loose to do what they do best: Drive fast, crash cars, and make things explode.

Death Car on the Freeway is a surprisingly good TV movie. Needham keeps the action brisk and, as with the truck driver in Steven Spielberg’s Duel, he keeps the identity of the Freeway Fiddler a mystery, focusing instead on the van itself, a souped up, roaring menace with darkened windows, as the fundamental threat. Granted, the pace falls off a bit when the narrative shifts from motorized mayhem to newsroom drama, and you can tell Needham is itching at the bit to get back on the road again.

Really, though, my biggest complaint about it at the moment is that the only versions kicking around are very low-definition. C’mon, CBS! Get this one out on Blu-ray and I’ll guarantee you at least one sale. Maybe two if you make it a double feature with Megaforce.

*Citation unnecessary. We all know it’s true. [Ed.: Yes, it is.]

Intermission!

• Yes, that is Sid Haig hanging out with the car club.
• Aaaaand that’s the Riddler himself, Frank Gorshin, as Claussen’s news director. It was in the same year that he reprised his Riddler role in the atrocious Legends of the Superheroes TV specials.
• Other cameo appearances include Abe Vigoda, Dinah Shore, Morgan Brittany and Harriet Nelson of Ozzie & Harriet fame.
• Granted, things explode in this flick for no apparent reason, but it was the ‘70s. That’s just how things were back then.