“There’s nothing I need to learn about myself that he couldn’t teach me.”

Sue’s rating: Hello double entendre, goodbye dignity.

Sue’s review: Today I’ve decided to talk about Scenes of a Sexual Nature. Now, I know that many of our readers are of the opinion that, old fart that I am, I wouldn’t know Scenes of a Sexual Nature from The Untouchables, but I’m here to tell you that I do. Oh yes, I do. The 40-Year-Old Virgin? I think not! But Scenes of a Sexual Nature, yes. I have definitely seen Scenes of a Sexual Nature. I’ll even go so far as to say I thoroughly enjoyed watching Scenes of a Sexual Nature. In fact, I wouldn’t have minded participating in Scenes of a Sexual Nature.

Because I liked the script.

What? You thought I was more interested in A Life Less Ordinary or The Day After Tomorrow? Have you forgotten that I know everything Better Than Sex? Scenes of a Sexual Nature is right up my alley, although I freely admit that my tastes are probably a little more… mature, than those of many in our regular audience.

Now, for Scenes of a Sexual Nature, a few things are absolutely vital. First of all, there’s setting; in this case, the bucolic and charming Hampstead Heath. Fresh air, soft grass warmed by the sun, dark wooded areas to frolic in, you get the idea.

Then, you need dialogue. Witty is good, heartfelt is better, and a sense of humor definitely helps, although sometimes a bit of dark intensity is most pleasing. Let’s face it. Scenes of a Sexual Nature would not be possible without decent dialogue. At least, it would be sort of meaningless without it.

And then, naturally, you need people.

To my way of thinking, Ewan McGregor was almost too prominent in Scenes of a Sexual Nature, although certainly not as prominent as he’s been in other movies I could name. Andrew Lincoln, possibly better known to Americans as the sign holding guy in Love Actually, had… well, too small a part, to be honest. Sophie Okonedo was downright antagonistic in Scenes of a Sexual Nature and Tom Hardy was laughably ineffectual in Scenes of a Sexual Nature. On the other hand, Eileen Atkins and Benjamin Whitrow were excellent in Scenes of a Sexual Nature. It really helped that they’re both in their seventies, otherwise, I don’t think they could have done what they did so beautifully. Clearly they are both masters of the craft. I will never again experience Scenes of a Sexual Nature without my thoughts lingering over those charming septuagenarians.

In short, I’d have to recommend Scenes of a Sexual Nature, although I think it’s necessary to warn you that some people will appreciate Scenes of a Sexual Nature more than others. It all comes down to personal preference, I suppose.

Didja notice?

• Does Ewan McGregor’s character only wear sunglasses so that he can peek over them coquettishly?
• It’s true. The older you are, the steeper hills become. It’s a geology thing.
• The plot thread with Louis and Esther . . . didn’t see that one coming. Not at all.