“I am alone in my dead mother’s cabin feeling nothing. I would love to judge you.”

Justin’s rating: My cabin is an overturned cardboard box that my exercise bike came in. It’s pretty rad.

Justin’s review: After watching the entirety of New Girl several times over, I’m convinced that out of that great ensemble, Jake Johnson’s Nick was the best of the group. (The rankings go Nick, Schmidt, Coach, Winston, and that’s it because Jess is poison.) So yeah, I’ve got a bit of a man crush on Johnson and will gladly watch him tackle other comedy projects.

Hey, I found a comedy project he did! It’s kind of weird, kind of sad, kind of quirky, kind of reflective, and kind of amusing. Plus it’s got The Good Place’s Janet in it, so I’ve got all my sitcom bases covered.

In Ride the Eagle, Johnson plays Leif, an aimless guy who finds out that his estranged mother Honey (Susan Sarandon) passed away and left her gorgeous cabin to him. There’s a catch, though: Leif’s got to complete a list of tasks that Honey left for him to inherit, otherwise he forfeits. I kind of like this idea and think it should be standard practice, because I’m totally going to send my kids on a globe-trotting scavenger hunt to inherit my SNES collection.

Despite abandoning Leif for a cult a while back, his mom felt a need to reconnect with her son, even beyond the grave — and kickstart him out of his arrested development. We the audience are invited into join him in this mellow life-affirming journey, perhaps wishing that someone would prod us to live a bit more and then gift us a million-dollar cabin as a prize.

Along with his dog Nora (who’s Jake Johnson’s real dog), Leif finds that the list pushes and prods him out of his wallowing complacency and into a new phase of life. Maybe his neglecting mother did know best at the end, trying to make up for lost time? But he also struggles with his huge resentment toward his mom as well as the regret of losing his love, Audrey (D’Arcy Carden).

His tasks involve kayaking across a lake, leaving a note for Honey’s former boyfriend, call up his ex and apologize, killing a fish with his bare hands, and playing a heartfelt song. Honestly, the list is kind of lame for a life-inspiring direction, and I only put up with it because the Yosemite scenery is flat-out gorgeous.

What I liked about this film is that it allows us to gradually get to know Leif and discover who he is without someone barging in and spitting out two sentences of backstory to explain him. He’s a real character with real depth, and that’s something of a rarity these days. His chemistry with Audrey feels genuine as well, even though we never get to see them together.

Yet I felt empty from seeing this. It’s a pandemic movie, which explains why there’s so much isolation and very few scenes where two people are in the same shot. And I don’t know about you, but I don’t really want to be reminded of the pandemic years any more. It also takes a brief foray into horror and suspense before going “psyche!”

Ride the Eagle is a vibe that occasionally has story. It’s a little slice of a guy’s life as it changes course, but it’s a very little slice. I was hoping for more depth, more catharsis, and definitely more laughs. Instead it takes a swing for a pretentious indie flick — just check out that nonsensical title — and only clips the ball.

Intermission!

• I wanna go swimming with my dog and play the bongos too, but I’ve got a movie to review
• “I don’t think cockroaches raise their kids.”
• That is one seriously gorgeous cabin. Wonder what the property taxes are.
• So much weed
• That was a weirdly aggressive phone call
• “I’m too stoned for this.”
• VHS tapes live in 2021!
• Don’t read the note man, get out of there!
• “You did your mom a solid, so thank you.”
• “Leif, is that a name or a word?”
• The overalls don’t really work for him
• A band called Restaurant
• “The next task is called Eat What You Kill.”
• Kill a fish by throwing a rock on its head?
• Haha the text messages are funny
• This is the worst phone call ever
• Dude takes a lot of showers
• “My personality? How is that not personal? It’s my personality!”
• Dead animals on the windshield is a good sign
• That is a terrible painting