“We knew then that we were being changed… and made part of their world.”

Justin’s rating: My Aunt Bea would be well-equipped to view this

Justin’s review: There are a few reasons behind my aversion to ’70s scifi movies, but it kind of boils down to a decade that’s hard on the eyes and films that are almost guaranteed to have a bummer ending. Maybe that’s why Star Wars did so well: It was the first film in the ’70s that ended on a hopeful note (but even then, a Wookiee was denied a medal, so enjoy your triumph as Chewie’s soul collapses in on itself).

Even armed with the knowledge that I’d be subjecting myself to beige earth tones and grief by the end credits, I knew I had to see Phase IV. A classic creature flick about ants rising up to take over the world? That weirdly sounds plausible. I’m in.

Some sort of vague space event radiates down to earth, sparking a higher level of intelligence in one of our world’s most numerous organisms, the ant. “Phase I” begins, as the ants stop fighting and start talking to each other — and they quietly start taking out their natural predators. Amid this, a couple scientists head out to the American desert to look into some of the weird stuff that’s happening around there.

And oh boy, is it weird. There are now these giant towering structures sticking out of the ground, crop circles popping up, and people and livestock go missing from nearby settlements. The scientists deduce that ant colonies are communicating and organizing at a higher level of intelligence than ever before — and like the Cylons, they’ve got a plan. A plan with phases.

While it’s easy to assume that this is just another well-intentioned but goofy environmental message movie, Phase IV garnered a well-deserved reputation for being a genuinely unsettling story about a hive mind developing right under our feet. Close-ups of the insects and certain shots are designed to get us well past any scoffing to encounter something close to a genuine sense of dread.

Our three human characters don’t give us much hope. There’s a very calloused scientist who doesn’t give a flip about people and eventually goes insane because he got bit one time. His partner is an ant linguist (?) who eventually pulls a Kent Brockman and actually sells out to his new ant overlords once he translates their demands:

And the girl they rescue from the farm where the two scientists accidentally gassed her parents freaks out constantly and incidentally helps the ants at every turn. I can forgive her this, as it was 1974 and the world hadn’t yet discovered that women could be multi-dimensional actresses.

I do have a lot of questions about how these two scientists arranged for a giant geodesic dome with a radar dish, a fridge full of supplies, loads of ’70s-era computers, gas chambers, and about 70 tons of equipment to be dropped off in the middle of the Arizona desert. Maybe I missed a line somewhere, but it’s pretty excessive for a tiny research camp.

Phase IV has the feel of a viral outbreak movie. As the phases progress, the scientists learn a little too late that they’re well behind the curve of this developing threat. It turns out that the ants aren’t too happy when their towers are blown up, and they retaliate with escalating responses, traps, and a willingness to dive for the hive. In related news, don’t make any plans to go to San Diego next summer.

Unlike 1954’s Them!, Phase IV didn’t go the route of gigantizing (?) the insects to make them a threat. It’s actually by keeping them their normal size but turning their industrious problem-solving to putting humanity in its place that makes them far more menacing. Plus, a lot of their machinations are suggested, rather than shown, leaving your imagination to fill in the gaps.

Things get super mind-trippy before all is said and done. Director Saul Bass (best known for his legendary title sequences) wasn’t interested in making a safe, traditional scifi horror flick. Oh no, he wanted to make one that would get under your skin and give you an idea of what it would be like to stare at an ant farm while under the effects of LSD. If you see this, I recommend looking up the director’s original ending, which adds another five or so psychedelic minutes.

While not a “fun” movie, Phase IV is captivating and most definitely unique. Part documentary, part drug trip, and part ’70s nihilism, you’re never going to see anything quite like it.

Intermission!

• Phase I is blurry stars?
• The beginning of this movie is just a long ant documentary, I think
• The ants eating that giant spider, no thank you
• Ant skyscrapers are cool
• Phase II is a flying bird?
• OK one ant in your hair shouldn’t send you into a tizzy
• Turns out that ant poison isn’t quite so good for people either
• “They killed my horse.” SMASH
• He’s got his lab set up as a deadly gas chamber?
• Powdered eggs, powdered milk, powdered juice, and dehydrated bacon
• “I did not sign up for a war against the ants!”
• Every sound in the world pushed together?
• Thank you for a whole scene of SUPER HIGH PITCHED NOISE
• Ant vs mantis vs ant
• The ants lining up their dead and crying over them is something I didn’t think I’d be seeing this week
• Ants are big into showing us fanservice
• That’s a lot of effort to kill just one ant
• Phase III is owls?
• Walking barefoot in hostile ant country is a terrible idea
• Ant death pit is pretty dang deep
• Ant slides look so fun!
• Fishgirl!