“Hi ho!” “Bye ho!”

Justin’s rating: Can college kids get glaucoma?

Justin’s review: I really never will forget seeing She’s The Man back in 2006 and thinking, “That Amanda Bynes is a genuine comedian on her way up in the world!” And then I pretty much never heard anything about her since then, so I guess things didn’t pan out too well due to substance abuse, criminal charges, and mental health setbacks. It’s kind of a shame, because she really was really funny.

At least I’m able to revisit about the same time period as She’s The Man with her college comedy Sydney White, which came out a year later. Bynes plays the titular character, a tough tomboy with way too much bronzer who grew up under the supervision of her plumber father after her mom died. Years later, Sydney embarks to college in Florida where she hopes to pledge at the same sorority as her mother.

This doesn’t work out so well, due to some stereotypical mean girls running the place now. So Sydney gets banished to the Vortex, a condemned house where she becomes somewhat of a leader to these stereotypical losers and outcasts.

As you might have surmised, “stereotype” is our word of the day, and it’s either part of the fun or a deal-breaker. Sydney White isn’t a movie that’s trying to be deep in the least, so it draws as many character trope cards as it think it can get away with. As it’s not mean-spirited, I’m generally fine with it (it takes a lot more to get my dander up these days).

Besides, where Sydney White fails in creative characters, it more than makes up for it with clever adapting. The whole film is a modern retelling of Snow White where part of the fun is identifying how the screenwriters figured out ways to translate the well-known story to a college environment. Think Apple computers instead of a poison apple, geeks instead of dwarves, “Tyler Prince” instead of Prince Charming, a Hot-or-Not site instead of a magic mirror, and so on.

Because this is essentially a college flick written for teens, it’s less crass and more goofy all around, which is just fine with me. Bynes has a lot of fun being the amiable non-conformist who plows right through the college’s established social structure, while the seven dorks are a great ensemble in and of themselves.

The Vortex is stocked with an angry blogger played by Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s Danny Strong, a guy who’s been at college far too long, a failed Boy Scout, a painfully shy puppeteer, a Nigerian student who sleeps all the time, and other likable guys. I mean, I’d rather hang out at their house than one of the frats, but then again, I know my own. Sydney ends up being a big sister-type influence who encourages each of them to be more than a punchline to a joke that’s been going on for far too long.

I’ve made no secret that one of my favorite types of movie and TV relationships is fraternal rather than romantic because the story possibilities are far greater. Here, Sydney and the dorks band together to reclaim the campus from the Greek system and maybe make the university more tolerant of all walks of life. It’s shades of PCU, which endeared me even more to this story.

Simple and silly, Sydney White is far more endearing than a whole lot of other college movies I could name — with or without the fairy tale allusions.

Intermission!

• An active construction site is the best place to sign greeting cards
• Plumbers teach their girls about periods using jury-rigged devices
• “I’m Dinky!” “Oh no you’re not.” “No, that’s my name.”
• “Yay, we’re jumping now!”
• She brought her comic book collection to college?
• Driving the cart through the marching band
• Aww I like the puppet dork
• Ha she beans the frat guy in the face with a football throw
• There is nothing more romantic than a 20-year plan
• That’s a creepy lullaby
• Breakfast IS good
• The pseudo-Star Wars music sting
• The Scooby Doo nightlight
• Terrance running into the door frame twice when he sees Sydney shaving her legs
• The roleplay battle flashback looks amazing
• The St. Louis Gorillas?
• I like how geeky Sydney gets about hammers
• HE’S SPEAKING WITHOUT THE PUPPET
• Voodoo dolls are good cheap therapy