“The Old Ones are not truly dead. They only sleep.”

Justin’s rating: This was a movie swap we did in June 2024, where Sitting Duck gave me this to review and I gave him The Toxic Avenger Part II.

Justin’s review: It’s both scary and thrilling to put yourself at the mercy of a fellow Mutant and say, “Give me a movie to review.” You have no idea if they’re just going to torment you, try to share a favorite, or throw a curve ball your way. After getting this from Sitting Duck, I can’t tell you which it may be.

I know The Dunwich Horror is supposed to make me tremble and wet my Underoos at the thought of old gods or whatever nonsense HP Lovecraft peddled back in the day, but the true fright is seeing Dean Stockwell’s horrid ’70s mustache thrust into the camera lens over and over again. Al, this is the wrong timeline, I tell you!

Stockwell plays Wilbur, an obviously suspicious and shifty man who blows into town one day to casually read the Necronomicon. He then uses his hypnotic powers to lure a girl named Nancy (Sandra Dee) back to his home in Dunwich for some casual drugging and kidnapping. Before you give me That Look, just know that this is for a good cause — the cause to open a portal to a spooky nightmare dimension or perhaps Comic Con.

Wherever that portal accesses, it’ll surely usher the end of the world as we know it. And we will NOT feel fine, probably because someone will be eating our skin like taffy.

The only question is whether Nancy’s friends might be able to rescue her before it’s too late — and what’s behind the mysterious door in Wilbur’s house. You know, that door that’s rattling and shaking. There’s some investigation into Wilbur’s family and history, and wouldn’t you believe it, it’s nothing good.

The Dunwich Horror makes extensive use of unusual cuts and lenses to give parts of this movie a disturbing dreamlike focus. However, like many of these Lovecraft movies, it’s a lot of sizzle and little steak. It’s not like they had the budget or special effects to show a horde of old gods rampaging across the earth, so it’s all premonitions and foreboding and “You better not let him open the portalllllll.”

Y’know? I think we’ll be OK.

It’s not without its merits, though. The atmosphere is surreal with some unnerving cinematography, and I was a big fan of the kooky cultist mansion. Looks like a fun place to explore. And Wilbur is so decidedly odd that it’s hard not to be fascinated with him. Dean Stockwell employs very, very little facial emoting and keeps his voice at a near-monotone. Yet he seems that much more intense for it.

You’re not going to find a typical ’70s horror movie here because I don’t think there was anything like a “typical horror” movie back then. While it does get points for mood, the third act in the dark is a muddled mess of flashing lights, implied danger, and a whole lot of suggested — but not shown — horror. Not really my cup of tea, but perhaps there’s an audience out there for movies where Dean Stockwell stares unblinkingly into the camera lense for a good fourth of the film.

Intermission!

• Nifty semi-animated opening credits
• People just casually returning the Necronomicon to the library
• Power rings! Hypnosis! Yeah this guy isn’t suspicious at all.
• Is that a super-hypno rock?
• You really don’t want to know what’s behind the locked door…
• The old guy’s pretty rad staff
• “As I entered the bedroom, there were two albino women robed entirely in black standing over her.”
• Dude has a whole lot of tattoos going on there
• Way to beat up a frail old man there!
• The camera goes crazy when she gets attacked by the monster
• The birds tried to capture his soul as it left his body
• “We bury our garbage in the city dump, not here!”
• It’s weird to get a fight scene with no music
• Spear to the gut!
• I don’t think this movie had the budget for birds so they play some rather unconvincing sound effects off-camera
• “Somethin’s bothering Rusty!”
• Did they get a good deal on footage of ocean waves in the dark? We certainly seem to go back to that well again and again.
• I like Wilbur’s “fish face” he does with his hands